Regress This: Zach Paikin and How to Fix the Liberal Party of Canada

When they are discovered, it can be fun to out closet conservatives.  There aren’t many, grant you, because to be an admitted conservative in the wrong company can be tantamount to admitting you spoon day-old curry into your underwear before leaving for work in the morning.  But hey, there are some, and sometimes they don’t even realize it themselves.

Take young Zach Paikin.  Not a Liberal and maybe, just maybe, a conservative.  Oh, gosh yes.  Just read his platform.

He was no doubt raised a proper young liberal Toronto urbanite, his father a well-known and respected journalist for TV Ontario, and one who has been making a nice six figure salary for the publicly owned broadcaster for many a year now (an aside…why do we still own a hardly-watched broadcaster anyways?  Tim Hudak, are you paying attention?).  I’m sure a number of private broadcasters have come for father Steve over the past several years, some of them offering substantial pay increases and bigger career opportunities given his obvious abilities as an interviewer and television personality, but it says something about the person and his world view when they decide to stay put in favour of the safe, publicly funded, niche job.

But we digress, or should we say regress.  The point is that young Zach was probably raised to be a Liberal.  It’s just natural.  To be anything but would be swimming against the flow in urban Canada and the elite hegemony that, at one time, governed this great nation of ours, sea to shining sea.

On the one hand we find it almost ridiculous that he and Max Naylor, another privileged urbanite keener are engaged in some little puppy fight over becoming the lead policy craftsman for the Liberal Party.  Mainly because they are both young and, dare we say it, know shit at their age.  The US law that prohibits anyone from running for congress before they reach the age 30 is a good one, because really, until you’ve created a dime of wealth or fought for your nation what business do you have developing policy frameworks that could potentially have real impacts on business, taxpayers or endanger the lives of those serving in our military?  It’s beyond presumptuous.  But hey, Mike Layton, these types of over-reaching political bastards are everywhere in our politics today, aren’t they?   (Barack Obama – patron saint of these parasites).

But the real irony of it is that little Zach is actually on to something.  You see, we here in Canada all need the Liberal party to find its feet again.  Because at some point, like all governments, the siren song of arrogance, entitlement, privilege and intellectual exhaustion will eventually bring it down.  And when the Harper Conservatives go down, who is going to be there to step in?  The NDP?  Oh, fucking hell.  Turn out the lights.  Game over.

At least at one point in time the Liberals, for all their power-grubbing, used to represent something of the pragmatic middle ground when it came to governing principles.  But when Liberals are running up socialist markers, NDP-lite policies, calling them “progressives” when running for policy lead roles, then we’re left with no real, reasonable, sane alternative in this country to keep the Conservatives honest.  You know, at one time the Liberals actually had a pro-business wing, represented by Paul Martin, John Manley and others.  At one time they didn’t have a reflexively anti-Israel stance on foreign affairs issues or pretend that we existed in a vacuum when it came to enacting environmental control issues.  But those days are gone, we suppose.

So little Zachie, keep the freak flag flying high brother.  We wish you luck in your effort to moor the Liberal party somewhere closer to the shore of common sense, instead of continuing its drift into the “progressive” ocean of idiocy.

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